One of the more common behavioural issues while manic is excessive spending. In some cases illusions of grandeur can be a bit of a problem. The two combined together can lead to expensive shopping trips but with no limits.
I am quite lucky that I can generally afford my spending sprees up to a limit, however now and again I over step the mark!
Everybody human being has a wish list of things they would like to buy. It could be one big thing like a certain car or many smaller purchases like TV’s or exclusive designer clothing. These desires are perfectly “normal”
Imagine you are in the shop where your desired item is for sale. you have just been paid and have a whole months wages in your bank account. The Item costs £1000 you have £1200 in your bank. You have enough money to buy this item right? Well yes you do theoretically. You could buy the item and walk out the store a happy chappy. But while you are thinking about it, something in your brain switches on and tells you ”oi! don’t you dare, it will only leave you with £200 for the month to live on and that’s before you have even paid your mortgage or rent” Your brain is telling you that even though you have the money in the bank YOU CANT AFFORD IT! . you might even try and have a quick argument with your brain and try to justify it but in the end your brain stops you from making the purchase. You think ”oh well maybe save a bit first”
Thats for “normal” people.
For people with bipolar, going through a period of mania the conversation with the brain in the store is very different. In my case usually none existent.
the conversation I have with my brian in periods of mania usually go like this:
me ”hmmmm nice big TV. Its £1000″
manic brain ”buy buy buy buy”
me ”yeah OK then”
manic brain ”good lad, your deserve it because you work hard”
me ”you know your right, shit I’m going to buy the overpriced stand for it too”
manic brain ”gooood idea”
Within 15 minutes of this conversation I will be leaving the store with the TV paid for and delivery arranged.
It wont be until my current manic episode calms down that I will realise that I have just blown £1000 of something that I didn’t need.
My mania can be very severe and sometimes acute. Because of this I have taken sensible steps to stop me from getting into serious debt. I have blacklisted myself! I had to contact the credit reference agencies and beg them not to to let me have credit!
Illusions of grandeur also accompany the spending. This can be quite hard to explain.
A good example would be taking a train ride from Manchester to Liverpool. It usually cost me £15.80 return standard class. Most people will choose this option because its only 50 minutes on the train. Surely anybody can put up with the piss heads and the over crowding for that amount of time?
During the manic months the grandeur will set in and I will have so such association with standard class. (snob) And if one thinks for a moment that one is going to stand for the journey then one is very much mistaken. I will swap my usual Burger king meal for Marks and Spencer’s overpriced delights and sit in FIRST CLASS on the train. . . . .yes for an extra £32 you can have a curtain and a table lamp. Not to mention the 2cm extra leg room. Oh and throw in a complete stuck up TWAT in a tie sitting next to you and you are now part of the Transpennine Express first class elite.
Grandeur does not happen very often but when it does be warned . . . one can become quite a pompous so and so what what what
so now you have a little background information in how my condition effects my spending habits.
This leads me to list 5 things that I have bought while manic . . . . .
1) A 14 X 60 1975 New Moon II Mobile Home . . . . . in Ohio USA. cost £500
So there I am on Ebay back in 2003 looking to buy some genuine rock brought home from the moon. When my search brought up this static caravan (not the one in the picture but i’m sure it was like this) . It was parked in some “Trailer park” in Ohio where there had apparently been a few Murders and a few shootings. But that didn’t put me off, £500 and I would never have to worry about a mortgage ! I could live in the caravan and start a new live over the ocean! BARGAIN! . . . .I bought the caravan from Ebay and to this day I have still not seen the dam thing, although I do have the keys . . somewhere.
2) 1152 T-shirts in 24 boxes with the phrase ” FREE DEIRDRE” written in them . cost £518.40
2008. Inspired my Tony Blair’s rally in parliament and backed by the campaign by the sun newspaper. Deirdre Rachid’s imprisonment was a total disgrace. I wanted to show my support to the cause and got 24 boxes of “FREE DEIRDRE” t-shirts printed and tried to sell them to market traders in Manchester. I think I sold 1 box to some weirdo in Bury.
3) a flight to the edge of space . . . flighing 70’000ft in a Russian MiG-31. cost £9795
Actually one moment of madness I don’t regret. In 2003 I was touring around Russia with one of the bands I was working with. While I was there I decided I visited the Space museum and come across this wonderful opportunity to fly in a MiG. The flight took you so high up that you can see the curve of the earth and also the blackness of space above you, your actually in the Stratosphere ! ! Apart from my son being born and the love of a certain woman in my life it was the most amazing experience ever! for about 5 minutes I was the highest person on the planet. I did however not think the cost through, I just transferred the money from my bank into the account of this Russian company and did it without a thought. Lets just say that when I got back the the UK and had to explain to the wife that the extra money from the house sale had gone. I didn’t come off to well . . .she actually used the phrase ”and the money we had saved up had gone into orbit” erm well yeah!
4) A horse called Collin . . . . Cost£450 (by accident!)
in 2009 I was visiting a friend in Ireland. he took me to his local pub to meet the locals. I got talking to a guy called James McDonald. He had a strong local accent and I spent most of the time just smiling and nodding at him. I didn’t have a clue what he was really saying. All i know is that he was talking about horses. Some guy come over and explained to me that James was a horse trainer and was very big in the racing world. What I didn’t know is the guy how told me James was a trainer was taking the piss out of James and actually James was the Village idiot and lived with his aging mother and 3 scabby horses.
As the night went on and a few drinks flowed I ended up giving James £450! I thought I was investing in a champion horse and my return was going to be massive . . . narrrrrr (or neighhhhhhhhhhh ?)
I soon discovered that I had actually BOUGHT the horse. The horse was called Colin and there was less meat on it than a chicken McNugget!
I explained to James that I had been mistaken in the purchase of this champion and that I might have a little trouble at the check in desk at Ryanair. James suggested that he bought the horse back off me for £100 . . . . . hmmmm pleasure doing business with you , you shit
5) An allotment in . . . . . . . . Baghdad. cost . . . £6.70 per year
One of my sideline jobs is photography. I used to work freelance and also do work for the Press Association. In 2008 I went to Iraq with a small team to document the lives of the Baghdad public. Being manic at the time put me in a very dangerous position because I thought I was 100% safe. I would wonder away from the security detail without telling anybody and go taking pictures. Very stupid and very dangerous. By 2008 the locals were beginning to trust the west a little more that they did a few years earlier. I was there for a period of 3 months. While there I became friendly with a nice family who really looked after us. They had an allotment that was used to grow veg and fruit and also hide weapons in the conflict.
The allotment space was massive, half the size of a football pitch.
I just had to get a plot and paid 5 years fees upfront ! I even panted some seeds and got the ground really nice! . . . ive not been back to Iraq since 2008 so im thinking that the harvest might be a little over due ?
so there you have 5 things I have spent money on while manic!
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